Sometimes I think I’m a fraud.
I’m told it’s a common phenomena, and not just among writers. Self-doubt is something everyone deals with at one point or another. But it certainly has been a huge hurdle for me over the past few years.
I have this belief that somehow I’m not good enough to consider myself a “real” writer. I mean, sure, I write, but I’m not published. Maybe I want to be, and that could be enough, yet I often hold back from calling myself a writer. I never tell people I first meet that I write. I rarely talk about my writing with good friends. Hell, I have trouble sharing my current draft with my Bookworm friend who has been my alpha reader for over ten years! It’s like I don’t think I deserve the attention, because, let’s face it, I’m a fraud.
The thing is, we’re all frauds sometimes. It’s what you do with that matters. Do you succumb to feeling like a wretched failure? Or do you endeavor to be the best of frauds, to be such a perfect liar, that eventually you’re not a fraud at all?
And because it makes me feel better, and is a pretty awesome speech, here’s a video of Amanda Palmer talking about the fraud police.